Japan souvenirs – the Art of Receiving

Japan 2015 Big Turn yes World 21I´m still too dizzy and jet lagged to think clearly but, here we go, I´ll give it a try. Don´t mind if this post is written on telegram mode. Compassion is required.

Just returned from Japan, where I was teaching, performing and judging. Tokyo was the city and AWE was the feeling. Awe for the country – Far, Far East indeed -, for the amazing work, for the special people I met, for the cultural discoveries, for the mental distance, for the ABUNDANCE I still have to learn how to receive with open arms.

When we grow up thinking only assholes get away with making it BIG it´s easy to blame ourselves when we start to make it BIG (have I done something wrong?); when we grow up listening that good, honest, humble people never reach anything in life it´s easy to close our arms when good fortune comes running towards us.

No matter how much I rationally know I DESERVE the best in life – both personally and professionally -, I still struggle with the ability to RECEIVE IT without feeling guilty for a crime I didn´t commit. It´s an Art, you see? Knowing how to receive. A-R-T. I´ve worked so hard and honestly for my goals, why would I feel guilty when the BIG FRUITS start falling on my lap? I´ve worked so hard on myself – to become who I am, the best version of myself -, why do I feel like I don´t deserve to be loved? Key word: WORK. I guess there´s some more archeological work to do within myself.

– Mr. Freud, please, come to my rescue! 

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Me at Senso-ji Temple.

Landing in Japan, working in what I love for an increasingly wider audience, educating myself through travelling, giving and receiving the LOVE, is AMAZING. And, yes, let me repeat it: I DESERVE IT ( I feel guilty just by saying it; I can hear those voices yelling at me: Who do you think you are, bitch?) 

Which brings me to fighting the fight (?) I already have with this silly guilt sense. I teach mental and emotional reeducation in my Oriental Dance classes, for God´s sake! You know what they say: you teach what you need to learn. BAM!

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Beauty is Everywhere Series. Photo taken by me in Tokyo.

I´d like to thank Joanne Pascual, the sponsor of Starry Nights Festival in Tokyo, for trusting me and to Heather Henna Louise for recommending my work. I´d also like to thank all the students, audience members, fellow dancers and strangers who made this trip unforgettable.

The actors at Kabuki-za theatre – where I spent an whole day watching plays in a strange language, manner and world -; the American singing teacher who crossed paths with me (twice!) and with whom I shared a few tunes (yes, we sang “Thinking out loud” by Ed Sheeran in the middle of Tokyo traffic jam); the strange yet wonderful meeting with Aida Nour, Egyptian dancer/teacher, in a restaurant; the people at the temples, street markets, dark corners. Tokyo itself. By night, in particular. Don´t get me started. Abundance, joy, beauty and lessons everywhere. And me, stuck in No Man´s Land, fighting with the ability to RECEIVE what I know it´s my right to receive. Ah!

It may be a work in progress, this Art of Receiving. I guess it is. So let´s do it. With the same might I apply to everything I do, I will jump into LIFE´s beautiful fruits with open arms. Just because. I deserve it. 11133746_10206200917564659_4617848475306204204_n

3 thoughts on “Japan souvenirs – the Art of Receiving

  1. You deserve the best! To repeat this as often as you need is one thing, but what helped me really is to add a little melody, make a song out of it and sing it all the time 😉
    I started with “We are the champions” and switched to more personal lyrics after some time. Music Therapy is really the best therapy, I think. ^^

    Like

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