As I launch myself, once more, into writing (my upcoming book reshaping) and choreographing new pieces to teach in China, within less than 2 weeks, I cannot avoid the costumary dread. I know I can do it greatly and I always doubt it. Every single time. No experience, know-how, previous success can prepare me for each new birth or make the road easier. It doesn´t get easier. The more you do, the more you know you´re able to do and in that extra mile resides the doubt – essencial doubt, perhaps.
This fear of not being good enough or not being able to do better than before; the eminent failure threat hanging around me, like a mosquito, it´s probably irrational but knowing it doesn´t help. Somehow, we have to accept our demons and move ahead with them by our side. If we wait for the day we´re fully confident about ourselves and what we create, we´ll be waiting forever or, I suspect, we´ll be heading for disaster. Insecutiry is not necessarily bad – it becomes a real problem when you let it freeze you. Feel the fear and do it, anyway – that´s the spirit.
Here I go, dancing with my demons and making the best out of them.
Intense CREATIVITY time is on.