Bitch, please!

485835_10151732201920007_1487373678_nWatch out: if you happen to be talented, beautiful (at least according to your society standards), intelligent, successful, strong, funny and kind to everyone you better watch your back. It may look, at first sight, like your Fairy Godmother was generous bestowing so many qualities on you but don´t rush into precipitate conclusions. You´re more doomed than blessed.

People will forgive you if you´re these amazing things and a bitch – they´ll hate you with all their might if you´re all this and you´re not a bitch (how do you dare?!).

Being a bitch – mean, envious, sour, without scruples – is something that, in most people´s minds, compensates for your general greatness: she´s amazing, yes, but – you know – she´s also a bitch!  That dark side kind of balances the light that bothers the onlookers. If you´re that amazing and you happen to be what we call a simple, nice, honest person, good luck. This is what I have for you: good bloody luck!

Add youth and a positive attitude towards life to that killer recipe and you´re heading to social disaster.

11367_10152587611113122_3826775274870748527_n (1)  1521247_10152702678268912_1270755416_nIs there any hope? Well, yes; maybe: get old, ugly or boring (the three of them at once will do wonders); become a pitiful failure of any kind (people L-O-V-E victim parties) or – you guessed! – reveal the bitch that was apparently hiding inside your chest (“I knew there was something wrong with her!“) – only then you´ll have a chance to be appreciated by the majority. Otherwise: get used to the haters and the backstabbers. Learn how to be feared & disliked just because.

Not fair, I know. Life´s fabulous. Life also sucks – deal with it.giphy

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