– You should take a rest, Joana…you deserve it. So many years of fighting against all kinds of tides…- My true friends keep telling me and I surely agree. I was born a warrior and I´ve fought for what I wanted and felt it was correct since I can remember – not a single second of mediocrity, easy paths, shortcuts, corruption (body, mind, heart or soul) or cowardice. I´ve demanded A LOT from myself and I´m proud of it – I´m also tired.
-Yep: I see your point. Even the best warrior needs a rest, once in a while. – Here´s the answer I offer to my well intentioned friends and to life. But life doesn´t listen and my friends aren´t stronger than life (neither am I). No matter how much I wish I could hibernate to gather focus, strength and purpose, The Great Wheel keeps turning and I have to keep dancing ahead, learning to recover from my battles in simple, short, fully enjoyed moments (like a day spent in Nature in the midst of wild Alaska 😉 ). I´ve become an expert on quick recovery techniques; if life doesn´t allow me to be a bear for the Winter, I manage to take a nap every once in a while.
My armour was never even put to rest inside of a closet: it has always been there, ready to be used, hanging by the kitchen door, never too far away from my eyes or chest; it even whispers: you gotta go down to the deepest point of that deep Ocean in order to jump back up again as your full self: be drowned without resistance until you touch the sandy ground of the deepest sea: then prepare, stomp that blessed, scary, dark, lonely ground and return to the surface, ready for the SUN.
I hear it clink, that ever present armour of mine: a little rusty,worn out, almost colourless (the rainbow is still reflected on it though) and READY for The Good Battle. Life is so generous: it usually offers me two choices – only two (to make things simpler): it´s either LIFE or DEATH. I guess you can imagine which one I choose.